Not My Dirty Laundry

I can't be quiet about it anymore. If you are planning on getting married to someone, don't you think you guys should be together longer than a year before getting married? I understand older people who have been married before, who have been around the block and have some common sense and knowledge under their belt getting married within or after a year. I know a couple that did this. I though it was stupid when they decided it but i was supportive because it wasn't my place to bitch or throw a fit, but....I'm airing out the dirty laundry. I wont use names but I'm done keeping it all inside and pretending to be OK with it.

What is marriage anyway? A piece of paper? A ring u wear on a specific finger?

I'm not anti-marriage. I want to get married one day, but I don't want to rush into it.

According to the Forest Institute of Professional Psychology, 50% of first marriages, 67% of second marriages and 74% of third marriages end in divorce. Now remind me again why everyone is in such a rush to get married??

Marriage is not something to be played with.

Wilt thou have this Man to thy wedded husband, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love him, comfort him, honour, and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live?

When you say "I do" After being asked whats above its a vow. Its not just words u agree to. Once these are said and you get your marriage license that doesn't mean you can get pissed off at your spouse and just up and decide to leave. You don't grab your stuff and disappear for a week and come back saying your sorry. You don't leave and say you want a divorce 3, 4, or 5 times within a year and then cry that he didn't fight for you, or make a scene for you. You are the ignorant one who decided to leave. You suck it up and work it out, you suck it up and deal with it. "running is the only thing i know" is not an excuse, it's a cop-out.

The fact that you left the first time, or even the second time shows that you are not serious about the commitment or the relationship.You hurt not only your spouse but everyone involved, their family, your family etc.Then after giving the final "I'm done i want a divorce" come crawling back and forth between your husband and an ex. By doing that you give your spouse the right to divorce you because you were unfaithful.

Weeks go by and things start to go bad with your ex, what do you do? You crawl back into your spouses life causing a tragic and heart wrenching incident that puts your spouses entire family on edge. Not just the family in the state but those out of state as well. "I didn't cause it" BULLSHIT!! You were talking to him about what happened. All of the bad. Putting all of the blame on him instead of on yourself. Its not shock that his family didn't want you informed, or there by his side.

Why would you be by his side? "Because he is my husband". Now he is, after he ends up in danger and fighting for his life. Why wasn't he your husband when you were banging your ex? Why wasn't he your husband when the thought of leaving came to mind? Why wasn't he your husband when you lied to everyone about living with your family when you left? He wasn't. You were using him, playing with his emotions. He cared more than you will ever know and more than he will ever show and you threw that away.

I know she will be pissed that i wrote this, but like she said to me "I was honest". I'm being honest now when I say the only reason I am nice to you, still talk to you or even kept you informed was because of a promise i made, and because of my dad. I promised if you two split up we would still be friends and against my better judgement i stayed your friend. Even when the only reason you talked to me was to ask questions about him. The only reason i kept you informed was because my dad told me to.

I find out they are getting back together. "This time till death". Isn't that the same promise you made when you got married? We will see how long it lasts this time.

Anyone reading please think about your choices. Getting married is not just something between you and the other person. It affects everyone around you, kids, friends, and family.

Unconstitutional? I don't think so!

Sheriff Arpaio 'America's Toughest Sheriff' is a role model for anyone running a prison.

 Arpaio served in the Army from 1950 to 1954 in the Medical Detachment Division and was stationed in France for part of the time. In 1992, Arpaio successfully campaigned for the office of Maricopa County Sheriff. The voters of Maricopa County re-elected him in 1996, 2000, 2004, 2008 and 2012.

 In his prison he serves inmates surplus food, and limits meals to twice a day. He banned "Sexually Explicit Material" such as Playboys after the inmates began "self pleasuring" when they saw female correctional officers and verbally harassed the officers. The ban at some point was challenged on First Amendment Grounds. He instituted an in-house radio station that broadcasts classical music, opera, patriotic music and educational programming. 

Arpaio also set up a "tent city". An extension of the prison where inmates stay outside. The "city" is in the yard next to a permanent structure containing bathrooms,showers and an area for meals. During the summer of 2003 the temperatures outside exceeded 110 degrees, and when the inmates began to complain he told them: 

 "It's 120 degrees in Iraq and the soldiers are living in tents, have to wear full body armor, and they didn't commit any crimes, so shut your mouths."

Many complain about these tents saying they are not adequate or humane and that there are violations of human and constitutional rights. Those that are critical of Arpaio also point out that the majority of inmates in "tent city" have not been convicted but awaiting trail.

 Arpaio re-instituted Chain Gangs in '95(All chain gangs are voluntary). A year later he expanded and instituted a female chain gang, the female inmates work 7 hrs a day (7 am-2 pm) six days a week. He instituted the worlds first juvenile chain gang:volunteers earn school credit toward a diploma.

 One of his most public-relations actions was the introduction of pink underwear. Due to the success with the underwear he extended the color to handcuffs, shirts, socks etc. He said "I can get elected on pink underwear..I've done it 5 times"

In '01 he was the first to require all inmates 18 and over to register for the Selective Service System( the means by which the US government maintains information on those potentially subject to military conscription). He also started the "have a Heart" program, where inmates may volunteer to be organ donors.

Many feel this mans methods are unconstitutional, inhumane etc etc. I want to tell those people to go F*&$ themselves.  Prison is not supposed to be a cake walk. It is not a vacation from the real world, it is a punishment!

 I applaud Arpaio for his tactics and methods. When someone goes to prison they shouldn't be comfortable. Do you realize that prisoners in jails and prisons across america receive health care? dental care? There are cases all over of people who commit crimes knowing when they get to prison they will get more medical attention than they did when they were free. Inmates gets dental care whereas out veterans only receive dental care if its life threatening or they meet a criteria that apply's to less that 50% of out veterans.

Screw them, they committed crimes, they don't have rights. I think prison should be absolutely miserable, that way when and if they get out, they wont want to come back. Sleeping in tents,wearing pink, 2 meals a day (not necessarily hot meals), 110 degree weather, limited TV and Radio, they should all be that subtle reminder not to go back to prison.

He's obviously doing something right, he has been re-elected 5 times.

Santa Arrested in Austin

4 Days ago a man dressed as Santa Clause was arrested for writing the word "love" in chalk on the grounds of the state capitol building in Austin, Texas.

Many people who witnessed him being arrested were not hesitant in making their comments, and asking the officers to tell the man why he was being arrested.The witnesses also stated that they have video of others writing with chalk as well. They asked repeatedly "Your'e arresting Santa?".

One woman repeatedly asked the officers to tell the man why he was being arrested. The man,visibly upset, began asking the officers why he was being arrested. This guy encouraged the kids nearby to write for wishes, they wrote words like "Peace" ,"Friendship" and "Community". they wished for world peace and other such things.

I dont actually know if its illegal or not to write on the grounds but really? Your gonna arrest Santa for writing "love"? Then while he is handcuffs and asking, begging and pleading to know why he was arrested you dont tell him? WTH!!


   Here is the video:

Watch More News Videos at ABC | 2012 Presidential Election | Entertainment & Celebrity News

Veterans Smiles

Veterans, the men and women who have served for our country. They have put their lives on the line against foreign and domestic threats to our nation. They spent months and months away from their friends and family. They sacrificed day in and day out for our rights and freedoms.

When the soldiers of our military come home for good whether it they are medically retired or they just served their X amount of years and decide not to go back, they get complete medical coverage compliments of our government. Good Job USA. You got something right. The US government offers many benefits for our soldiers and their families.

Unfortunately they do not give our veterans dental care. Its an amazing sight seeing our veterans smile. Whether its when they are reminiscing on fond memories of the time they served, receiving thanks for their sacrifices, getting a card or letter from kids around the country wishing them a happy holiday or a speedy recovery. Many veterans do not smile because they need dental work and are embarrassed.

Many will doubt what i have written. "There's no way, they have to have dental". Im here to tell you that no they don't. I know for a fact that they don't. My dad is a veteran of US Army, and i can't tell you how many times we have talked about it, how many times it has come up in conversations when we go to the VA hospital or his doctors appointments.

I think its outrageous that they don't have dental. If we can give them full medical i think we can give them dental. Medically they pay for MRI's, CT scans, lab work, prescriptions, Doctors visits, Surgeries etc. Why cant they cover the annual teeth cleaning, fillings, sealants, extraction etc??

Veterans can only receive dental care if they are eligible for a certain level of care.The guidelines according to the Veteran Affairs Health Care Website are as follows:

1. Have a service-connected compensable dental disability or condition.
2. Are a former prisoner of war
3. Have service-connected disabilities rated 100% disabling or are unemployable and paid at the 100% rate due to service connected conditions
4. Apply for dental care within 180 days of discharge or release(under conditions other than dishonorable) from a period of active duty of 90 days or more during the Persian Gulf War era.
5. Have a Service-connected noncompensable dental condition or disability resulting from combat wounds or service trauma.
6. have a dental condition clinically determined by VA to be associated with and aggravating a service-connected medical condition
7. Are actively engaged in a 38 USC Chapter 31 vocational rehabilitation program.
8. Are receiving VA care or scheduled for inpatient care and require dental care for a condition complicating a medical condition currently under treatment.
9. Are an enrolled Veteran who may be homeless and receiving care under VHA Directive 2007-039.

Does that even make sense?!?! NO! To me is doesn't. In my mind, if anyone in this country was to be treated like a celebrity and idolized by our friends,family, and children it should be the Soldiers that put their lives on the line everyday so that we can continue to live the way we do. We can own guns, have as many kids as we want, talk to who we want, marry who we want. We can vote, we can go to court, we can wear what we want, and believe what we want. The next time you see a veteran, or a soldier, young or old, disabled or healthy, do you know what you need to do?

I DONT CARE HOW BUSY YOU ARE OR HOW MUCH OF A HURRY YOU ARE. YOU TAKE YOU FREE ASS OVER TO THAT AMERICAN SOLDIER AND YOU SHAKE THEIR HAND AND YOU THANK THEM FOR EVERYTHING THEY HAVE DONE FOR THIS COUNTRY THAT YOU CALL HOME. THANK THEM FOR PROTECTING YOUR RIGHTS AND FREEDOMS! THANK THEM FOR SERVING THIS COUNTRY!! YOU OWE THEM THAT MUCH!!!



If you would like to help put a smile on a soldiers face then check out:   https://www.facebook.com/opwritehome or http://operationwritehome.org/

End of The World

Well so much for the end of the world. 12/21/12 consisted of nothing but posts about how the world would end, and what everyone wants to do or would do blah blah blah.

 yesterday i saw nothing and heard nothing but a continuous countdown to the time when it was predicted to end. Once that time passed I saw a whole lot of "It didn't end!" "when will it end again?". I think we all just cling onto the idea that the world will end one day because of how fucked up our world is.

Today I'm seeing the same  crap as yesterday, why didn't it end, i do you so's, I cant wait till the next one, I don't think it will actually end anytime soon.

If it does end it will be after we are all dead and gone. Maybe it will be our kids, or grand kids, possibly our great grand children. Either way, however long it takes I don't want to be here for it. I don't know if it will be painful or just quick and painless.

This world is messed up in every possible way, and will never actually be at peace. We are always going to be at war with someone, or trying to "help" these countries that didn't ask for our help in the first place causing riots, and violence towards their government. we will always have over flowing prisons, corrupt politicians(there is no such thing as an honest politician), gang and racial violence, horrible economy, a systematic government that cant function or fix the problems they created,people caring more about money and social standings than about people,no dental care for veterans(another topic ill write about today), high unemployment rate,child obesity,murderers, serial killers, Rape and Pillage, etc etc.

The world we live in is not as great as we think it is. We are better than most countries but we are not what we used to be. people are so obsessed with power and their material possessions that they lose sight of whats really important in life. If a poor man has love, is he really poor at all? If the world ends one day it would mark the new beginning of our world, but i fear we will all end up the same as we are now.

Kids and Technology

Has anyone else felt like kids are becoming way too attached to electronics? Demanding new electronics? That they are driven by them, to get the "nect best thing"?

There are 7 yr old's with Ipods,Ipads, Iphones/Cell Phones, Laptops, Desktops, Digital cameras, etc etc.

Why the hell are we giving our kids so much access to these electronics and technology? Do they really need it?
I don't think so.

I have heard numerous reasons as to why parents let their kids use them, why they buy them for their 5,6,7 or 8 yr old.
 "it will help them advance faster in this world" or "it will make them smarter" or "they enjoy it"
"I want my child to have experience with technology" or "it will better their future" or "they have fun"

NO! Open your eyes, use your brain! Did you have that much access to electronics? Did your parents?

I didn't get a cell phone till i was almost 17. I never used computers until I was in school, and even then the computers we had where only there to tell us where to find books in the library. Our library was more books than anything.

We all see it, hear about it, and some of us bitch and whine, others see no problem with it. I feel bad for all of the generations below me. They will never learn the way we did. they will have a consistent need for electronics and the latest technology.

There are few cases where technology and electronics are acceptable for a small child. There are children with speech disabilities, or learning disabilities such as Dysgraphia, Autism, Dysarthia, or Orofacial Myofunctional Disorders. All affect a child, or adults, ability to communicate.

We have spoiled our children to a point of no return. They will one day be so dependent and driven on technology and electronics they wont be able to sign their own name. Is that really what we want for our children? Our grandchildren?

Our children do not need technology or electronics to be happy, or to have fun. Im 100% sure we survived, out parents survived. Send their little butts outside!! You remember that place right? OUTSIDE!! ts where kids learn social skills that include/require verbal skills and people skills, not typing on a keyboard, or use of an electronic.

They will develop people skills, verbal skills, and learn how to act in a social setting. It gives them a sense of independence because they can make their own friends and have face to face relationships. Not an Internet relationship, or technological skills

Guns & Stuff

Here we are, after a mentally ill, unstable man looses his mind and decides to kill 20 children and 6 adults the discussion of guns and the 2nd amendment are coming up left and right. Among teachers, students, adults teenagers, and grandparents, pretty much everyone and anyone who uses firearms or likes firearms. 

My Warning, if i refer to something wrong PLEASE let me know!

Im not from a state where guns are easy to get. Im from California so I had to go a little deeper to find out the whole process.

In Califonia There are typically three phases involved in the application process for obtaining a California permit to carry a concealed weapon.

-The first phase involves the paper application. All issuing agencies require that you submit a uniform application to carry a concealed weapon in California.

-The second phase involves the interview process. This is when the issuing agency will discuss your need for the license, your criminal history, and the consequences of choosing to carry a concealed weapon. It is also when they will take your fingerprints. Some agencies may require a second interview.

-The third phase does not apply to all counties / cities. This is the psychological evaluation. If conducted in your area, you will be required to undergo psychological testing. 

There are several fees involved. They will vary from agency to agency, but as a guideline:
$70 - $125 - Department of Justice (fingerprints & background check)
$100 – Local processing fee
Training – varies, typically no more than $250, at most.

In Texas The Concealed Handgun Law sets out the eligibility criteria that must be met. Applicants must be at least 21 years of age (unless active duty military) and must meet Federal qualifications to purchase a handgun.  A number of factors may make you ineligible to obtain a license, such as: felony convictions and some misdemeanor convictions, including charges that resulted in probation or deferred adjudication; pending criminal charges; chemical or alcohol dependency; certain types of psychological diagnoses protective or restraining orders, and defaults on state or city taxes, governmental fees, or child support. applicants must complete a minimum 10 hour class, taught by a DPS certified CHL instructor.

 I was skeptical on how reliable the info was so I asked my friend Skylar about it and he said:

 "Each teacher vary in there prices, but the prices that I've seen on average are between  

150-170 dollars. It's a 10 hour class."

Now that's a lot of information to take in and that's all just for a hand gun, can u imagine for a rifle? or "assault weapons" but After looking at all of that,  I am with the many Americans who are Pro 2nd Amendment. I think we should be allowed to purchase "assault weapons".

 In the state of Texas if you feel threatened or that your life is in danger (at least thats how it was explained to me) because of someone who is one your property, yeah thats right PROPERTY, you can shoot them. In 

California you have to wait until they are in your house before you can shoot them otherwise they can press charges on you!!  How crazy is that? Someone is coming to kill you or do bodily harm to you and your family you can't shoot them dead until they are inside your home. How ridiculous does that sound? Someone threatening your well being, your families well being and if you shoot them them too soon you could be arrested for (depending on your shot) murder!

Do we make Gun Laws stricter?

What good would that do? There are ao many guns out on the street as it is. If someone really wanted a gun, they wouldn't go take a class or get a permit. They call a friend of a friend and within a small time window they have a gun. If they are mentally unstable then we have school shootings, triple homicides  murders, suicides etc.

Today on Facebook Skylars status caught my attention, it said :

You know this gun control is a bunch of BS! Trying to ban "assault weapons" come on really? you can turn anything into a assault weapon! The first murder on this earth was by a rock! Why don't you try banning rocks! Or how about 9-11 the men hijacked airplanes using box cutters try banning them! Of course you won't...but don't want to accept that some people are just completely insane! That incident could of happened anywhere! It's a very tragic thing that happened, but why take it out on law abiding citizens. Guns are not just simply life takers. They're recreational as well and some people's way of life, and means of survival! You try taking them there WILL be ALOT of citizens pissed off! Then what are going to do? I am a very strong supporter of the 2nd amendment, and if you are too I think you may possibly feel the same way

 He is right. We can't ban all the things that have been used to kill people. I'm pretty sure you can kill someone with a fork, spoon, Pencil etc. When people have their weapons, guns "assault weapons" whatever you want to call them, there is less crime. Think about it. What person in their right mind is going to rob you, or try to assault you, or threaten you with a weapon if you have one as well? 

Since this school shooting, death of 20 kids and 6 adults is what sparked this whole discussion, lets look back. If one of the 6 adults killed had a weapon on them, do u think they would have been killed? The shooter (Lanza) wouldnt have been able to rack up a total of 26 killed, 27 if you include his mother, THE OWNER OF THE GUNS!

I have ranted and raved and gone into too many directions. I'm done with this topic for awhile, maybe ill finish another day.

**Wanted to say thank you to Skylar for answering my many almost blonde questions about Texas and their guns, and for letting me use his status. THANK YOU SKYLAR!!***

http://www.census.gov
http://www.shouselaw.com/concealed-weapon.html
https://txapps.texas.gov/txapp/txdps/chl/
https://www.facebook.com/skylar.long.9?ref=ts&fref=ts

Kids & Parents

Now everyone i know has an opinion on the drastic drop in disciplinary actions taken by parents now a days. Some say its better the way it is now because its better for the child and their self esteem, their confidence etc etc. All just psychological bullshit that makes no fucking sense. Lets look at this topic for a minute. My generation didnt get the ass whoopins our parents got, or our grandparents got. Today they label it as "Abuse". I will admit, i didnt get a whole lot of ass whoopins throughout my childhood. Don't get me wrong, i can remember getting the belt taken to my behind, hearing stories from my grandmother who told me straight up that she gave me ass whoopins when i was little, but kids now, holy cow, are they headed downhill!

Next time you go to Wal-Mart or the grocery store, watch how the children in the store behave for their parents. without a doubt you will come across at least one of the "mommy please can i have this?" situations. Now a days the parental response is simple, just a verbal "no". More often than not the child will then proceed with a tantrum consisting of screaming, crying, or a mixture of both. Today parents will do what they can without getting physical with their child. Back then that screaming crying child would  have gotten spanked with the speech " what did i tell u in the car? i told you not to ask for anything or to touch anything" or "Just wait till we get home". I can recall on more than one occasion getting "just wait till we get home", and on occasion you would have come across that parent that would jokingly say they were gonna leave them there to cry.

Back in the day kids were disciplined with:
Belts
Fly Swatters
Shoes
Hot Wheels Race Car Tracks( you know the orange flexible ones)
Wooden Spoons
Paddles
Sandals
Spatulas (Metal and Plastic)
Iron
Back Scratcher
Nintendo Controller Wire
Christmas Tree Lights
Phone Books

Did the generations before mine really get abused? or were they, as Eddie Griffin said "My mama beat my ass out the penitentiary"??

Sandy Hook Elementary Shooting

On 12/14/12 there was a massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newton,Connecticut.
 The death toll? 26 Dead
Out of those 26 deaths are 20 children as young as 5 years old and as old as 10.
The shooter? 20 year old  Adam Lanza
He killed 20 children and 6 adults including the Principal and himself. He was said to have a personality disorder and was possibly Autistic.
In his vehicle they found 2 Pistols and a rifle, and that's not including the weapons he had inside the school with him.

To me this is an unbelievably tragic event.  According to CNN:

 "Police say Lanza killed his mother, Nancy, at her Newtown home before going to the school, where he primarily targeted two classrooms."

"With the death toll at 26, the massacre in Newtown is the second-deadliest school shooting in U.S. history, behind the 2007 Virginia Tech mass shooting that left 32 dead"

"Three weapons were recovered from the school on Friday: a semi-automatic .223 caliber rifle made by Bushmaster was found in a car in the school parking lot, and two pistols made by Glock and Sig Sauer were found with suspected gunman Lanza's body, a law enforcement source said previously."

"The weapons were legally purchased by Lanza's mother, said the official, who was not authorized to release details of the case to the media."

CNN also reported that its believed that Lanza killed his mother in her home before he went to the school.

In my mind I cant believe there are people out there who would target children. What kind of person are you to point your gun at an innocent child and pull the trigger? But he didnt kill just one child, he killed 20!! This event is sending the discussion of gun laws through the roof. "we need stricter gun laws". So that what? the people who are mentally unstable put a little more effort into getting one? making it harder to trace the guns they illegally possess?

 Others are going ape shit on mental health care. "maybe if he had the access to proper treatment" or "if it was as easy for mental health care patients to receive care as it is to get a gun.."..Fox News questioned whether or not his parents knew how much of a danger he was, when they asked people who knew him they described him as a "nerd" or "goth" and that "he didn't interact with others". So we have here a mentally unstable man who didnt socialize well with others and prefered to keep to himself, he gets ahold of his mothers guns, kills her and then goes and kills 20 children and 6 adults leaving one survivor(One survivor according to CNN).

Guns dont magically aim at people by themselves. Guns don't  miraculously decide to shoot women and children. The psychotic Mentally unstable people who get a hold of them do. Maybe instead of pointing the finger at the mental disease or the guns themselves that we point fingers at the man who pulled the trigger.

If the shooter has lived and gone to court whats to say he wouldnt have been executed anyway? The wouldnt determine it based on his actions, or te types of weapons he used. it would be determined based on his mental state, or whether or not he was mentally competent.

According to the Death Penalty Information Center:

Insanity or mental incompetency is a severe form of mental illness and is addressed separately by the legal system. Inmates who are insane, that is, so out of touch with reality that they do not know right from wrong and cannot understand their punishment or the purpose of it, are exempt from execution. The Supreme Court held in Ford v. Wainwright (477 U.S. 399 (1986)) that executing the insane is unconstitutional. However, if an inmate's mental competency has been restored, he or she can then be executed.  Inmates who are intellectually disabled (mentally retarded) also cannot be executed.  Inmates who are mentally ill, but not insane, have no such exemption

My heart goes out to all of the families, friends and anyone who was close to the victims of the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting. I am not a parent but this absolutely tragic event is unbelievable. I couldn't imagine getting the news that my little brother was killed in a shooting while at school. I cant imagine what it would be like to lose a child, especially after all of the different ways my parents made sure i realized that they loved me more than i could even know or understand.

There has been a Facebook made if you want more information, or if you would like to levae your heart felt note to the victims and survivorrs of this tragedy:

https://www.facebook.com/SandyHookChildren

Posted today by the site above :

7 Double Doubles W/Cheese

7 Double Doubles W/Cheese

Height: 5'3"

Weight: 134 lbs

I type that and it looks odd to me. I remember weighing 120 lbs and that was on a bloated day. Today im comfortable in the 130-140 lbs range. Until I realized my boyfriends ex's are all skinny as fuck. I mean crack head skinny. skinny enough that when i saw pictures of them all i could think was that they needed to eat about 7 Double Doubles with cheese and extra french fries 2 times a day!

Now I'm not saying that I feel less adequate because his ex's are all skinny. I just have many questions that seem to roll through my head. 

1. How did he not split those girls down the middle while doing "the Horizontal Tango"?

2. Did he ever lose one of them because they turned sideways?

3. How the Hell did he go from these girls who looks like they are maybe 100 lbs soaking wet with a brick tied around their ankle, to me, a girl who isn't afraid to eat and is considered a "thick girl"?

4. Does he prefer girls that skinny?

All probably just over reactions but they do go through my head. When I see girls who are friends with him, but also friends with the ex i get weird about it. Its as if all crack head skinny girls all hang out together. what the hell would they talk about?? I can just picture it now:

Girl 1-Hey! Check out my rib. I can count 2 of them now!

Girl 2 - Oh thats nothing check this out!

Girl 3 - OMG! I can see 4 of yours!! Lucky!!

Girl 1 - What about you?

Girl 3 - Check it out!

Girl 2 - OMG i can see every bone in ur body!

Girl 3 - I know :D

Girl 1 & 2: Im so Jealous I wish i was that thin.

Not only are they Skinny as a stripper pole,from what i have seen and heard, they are all lying cheating bitches, who are into the "Swag" and "Yolo"... just UUGGHHHH the frustration i put myself through.

Drunk Night Before Christmas(not mine)

Drunk Night Before Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house,
There were bottles and butts left around by some louse.
And the best fifth I'd hidden by the chimney with care
Had been snatched by some bum who had found it right there.

My pals: guys and gals had been poured into their beds
To wake in the morning with hungover heads.
My mouth, full of cotton, dropped down with a snap
Because I was dying for one wee nightcap.

When through the south window there came such a yell,
I sprang to my feet to see what the hell...
And what to my bloodshot eyes should I see
But eight drunken reindeer caught in a tree.

Way in 'mongst the branches was a man in a sleigh.
I saw it was Santa, quite oiled and tres gay.
Staggering nearer those eight reindeer came
As he burped and hiccupped and called them by name:

"On Whiskey, on Vodka, we ain't got all night!
You too, Gin and Brandy, now all do it right.
Clammer up to the roof; get the hell off this wall!
Get going you rummies, we've still a long haul!"

So up on the roof went the reindeer and sleigh,
But a tree branch hit Santa before he could sway
And then to my ears, like the roll of a barrel,
Came a hell of a noise that was no Christmas carol.

So I pulled in my head and cocked a sharp ear.
Down the chimney he plunged, landing smack on his rear.
He was dressed all in red, with white fur for a trim.
And the way Santa swayed, he was tanked to the brim.

The sack on his back held nothing but booze,
And the breath that he blew nearly put me to snooze.
He was both plump and chubby and tried to stand right.
But he didn't fool me; he was high as a kite.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work
And missed half the stockings, the plastered old jerk.
And laying his thumb on the end of his nose,
He fluttered his fingers as he quoted prose.

He sprang for his sleigh at so hasty a pace
He tripped on a shingle and slid on his face.
But I heard him burp back as he passed out of sight:
"Merry Christmas, you lushes, now really get tight." 


Originally from Here

Redneck Night Before Christmas(not mine)

Redneck Night Before Christmas

’Twas the Night before Christmas, and all through the shack
Not a creature was stirrin’, cept the lice on muh back.
The skoal cans wuz nailed to the screen door with care,
With hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The children were sleepin’, all snug in their beds,
While visions of tractor pulls danced in their heads.
And Ma in her nightgown all stained with pound cake..
Had just settled down to watch Ricki Lake.

When out in the driveway, a loud noise I heard,
I opened the winder to check muh T-bird.
I ran to the door, like I’s on a mission,
But I tripped on some parts from muh granny’s transmission.

The moon shone outside, the hound dog wuz barkin’.
Muh daughter weren't home yet, she wuz still out parkin’.
When what to muh whiskey blind eyes should I see
But a Chevy S-10, pulled by eight flyin’ sheep.

With a fat nasty driver, so disgustin’ and sick
I said “Shoot Fire!” That must be St. Nick!
More rapid than X-lax his wooly sheep came
And he belched and he hollered, and he called ’em by name.

Now CLIFFORD! Now VERNON! Now LESTER and ENUS!
On FESTUS! On ELMER! On ROSCOE and CLETUS!
From the top of the shack to them there garbage bins
Now Dash Away! Dash Away! Dash Away youins!

I heard a loud sound on the roof of muh shack.
Pud down muh beer and went fer muh gun rack.
He fell through the roof, plum killed my dog,
I swear that ole’Santa looked just like Boss Hog.

He wore a T-shirt, rebel flag on the front,
And his jeans were all bloody from that morning’s hunt.
A big nekkid lady tattooed on his arm,
And he wore black boots that he’d picked up in ’Nam.

His eyes, how they glazed from too much Wild Turkey.
From the side of his mouth hung a stick of beef jerky.
A scar on his cheek from a fight with the cops.
The veins on his face looked ready to pop.

The butt of a Marlboro clung to his lip
He wore a hip pack full of B-B-Q chips.
He had a fat face and a hairy beer belly.
I ain’t seen one that big since muh ex-wife Shelly.

He was gap-toothed and dumb with an I.Q. of three
And I laughed cause that redneck was smarter than me.
A wink of his eye, a fierce shake of his head,
From his hair came a rat that ran under the bed.

He reached in his sack, sipped his gin and tonic,
Then filled the kid’s stockings with Hooked on Phonics.
His toys came from Big Lots and they weren’t very nice
But he had lots of them and yuh can’t beat the price.

He gave us a tape of them hound dogs that sing
Jingle Bells ringing on ma dingaling.
Some Crisco, some Spam, some Oatmeal Cream pies,
And a Nascar T-shirt in Double X size.

When the presents were gone and he had no more,
He staggered and stumbled right through muh screen door.
He hopped in his truck, to his sheep gave an order
“Hurry up youins! To the Tennessee border!”

And I heard him cry out, with a strong southern drawl,
“MERRY CHRISTMAS YOU REDNECKS!
MERRY CHRISTMAS Y’ALL!”

Originally From Here

Night Before Christmas...Ghetto Style(Not Mine)

Night Before Christmas...Ghetto Style

'Twas da night befo' Christmas and all in the hood
Not a homie was stirring cuz it was all good
The tube socks was hung on the window sill
And we all had smiles up on our grill
Mookie and Bebe was snug in the crib
Bumpin' phat beats cuz the system's fly
I bounced to the window at a quarter pas'
Bout ready to pop a cap in somebody's-
Well anyway
I yelled to my lady, "Yo peep this!"
She said, "Stop frontin', just mind yo' bidness!"
I said, "For real doe, come check dis out!"
We weren't even buggin, no worries, no doubt
Cuz bumpin and thumpin' from around da way
Was Santa, 8 reindeer and a sleigh
Da beats was kickin', da ride was phat
I said, "Yo red Dawg, you all that!"
He threw up a sign and yelled to his boyz
"Ay yo, give it up, let's make some noise!
To the top of the projects and across the strip mall
We gots ta go, I got a booty call!"
He pulled up his ride on the top of da roof
And sippin' on a 40, he busted a move
I yelled up to Santa, "Yo, ain't got no stack!"
He said, "Damn homie, dese projects is wack!
But don't worry black, cuz I gots da skillz
I learnt back when I hadda pay da billz."
Out from his bag he pulled 3 tings
A credit card, a knife, and a bobby pin
He slid down the fire escape smoove as a cat
And busted the window with a b-ball bat
I said, "Whassup, Santa? Why'd ya bust my place?"
He said, "You best get on up out my face!"
His threads was all leatha, his chains was all gold
His sneaks was Puma and they was five years old
He dropped down the duffle, Clippers logo on the side
Santa broke out da loot & my mouf popped open wide.
A wink of his eye and a shine off his gold toof
He cabbage patched his way back onto the roof
He jumped in his hooptie with rims made of chrome
To tap that booty waitin at home

Originally from Here

Waiting for a Money Shot? (Explicit Content)

I just talked about the Duck Face Girls but, I feel i need to attack the Money Shot Girls next.

Dear Money Shot Girls,

Taking a picture with your mouth wide open, tongue hanging out while flipping off the camera doesn't make you cute, classy,ghetto fabulous,a bad bitch or attractive. 

 It makes you look like straight up Ghetto Hood Rat Trash. It Looks like you are waiting for a Money Shot to the face!

I'm pretty sure none of you Money Shot Girls even knows what a Money Shot is. If you do, good. Go tell all your Friends/Home Girls etc so when they take these pictures they are fully aware of how trashy they are.

For those of you who don't know Pay Attention:

Money Shot Definition  : External male ejaculation in a pornographic film onto his partner's body.

 The term comes from earlier days of pornography in which sex acts were often simulated, and this showed that it was not. It was referred to as "The Money Shot", because customers were willing to pay a higher price for actual than stimulated sex.

Now that you know what a Money Shot is Please just stop embarrassing yourself You don't need to make yourself look like ghetto hood rat trash. You shouldn't want to look like your waiting for a money shot in the face!!

Dear Duck Face Girls

Dear Duck Face Girls,

Has anyone ever told you that you look ridiculous?

That by pushing your  lips further and further away from your face, that your making yourself less attractive?

Obviously they haven't. Lucky for you I'm here to give you just a few words of advice, you don't have to take them but I'm sure if you did everyone around you would be great full. 

Now I know you girls must think that by making yourself look like Donald or Daffy that you will get more attention, that it will make you hotter or whatever. It doesn't. You literally look more like Donald and Daffy. Now think about this for a second,not too hard i wouldn't want to burn out whats left of your brain cells.

What did Daffy and Donald do for our childhood?

My Answer:Made Me Laugh

Girls, that's all your doing. you are making it so much easier for the world to laugh at you. You can try to get mad, and we will all fake our "I'm Sorry" and continue laughing at you because you chose to look that stupid.

You are not Angelina Jolie. Her lips are not even naturally that big. 

If you want lips like hers go inject the fat from your ass into your lips.

But just be warned, it doesn't matter if you do inject your face with your ass fat, because we will all still laugh at you for thinking that a duck face is cute.

Sincerely,

Me